Hum drum. Blah blah. blech.

I thought this pic went well with the emotions...:)

Do you ever suspect that your poor behavior is fueled by some underlying thought or emotion that hasn't really surfaced yet?  Instead, it is just lurking in the dark corners of your mind, surfacing in moments of frustration, and then, unfortunately, poorly directing at the ones you love?  Then of course, those moments of frustration increase, because, well, you're grumpy.  No, you don't?  Well, I do. The holidays are my favorite time of the year...It just hasn't clicked yet for me this year.  We are eleven days away from the big day, and I'm struggling to get in the true spirit.  I adore the excitement the kids have, and am kind of coasting off of their emotions right now.  I'm not sure what or why, lots of factors I'm sure, but I'm just...blah. Last night, we played a game for family home evening where we learned about becoming more like Jesus.  It was meant to be fun, but ended with Sydney in tears because she inadvertently chose all 'bad' scriptures, which resulted in her moving away from Christ.  In an attempt to make her happy, I moved her piece to the end of the game, which caused complete uproar from the others.  It ended with me deflated and frustrated that we had even attempted anything at all.  And then, of course, I was grumpy.  I read about a family that decided that Christmas was way too commercial, and not enough about family anymore, so they decided to only do what made them happy.  Simple decorations. Only giving gifts they felt like giving.  Not running around feeling stressed and out of money.  I really thought that had a ring to it...note to self; don't stress.  Make it all about the kids. It doesn't have to be 'perfect' to be the perfect holiday.  Don't worry, I'll get there.  I always do.  We invited Joel's parents to come down from Idaho to celebrate with us Christmas Eve, and they accepted, so that's making it a bit more real and exciting.  I made a batch of white-chocolate fudge that I've practically consumed myself.  Ahem, don't judge. It's delicious stuff.  :) Christmas shopping will probably help too. (yep, you read that right, haven't started yet).  Ack.  This Scrooge needs a reality check.  :)  I'm going to go read the Christmas story and hug my kids.  That'll be a good start....